Sunday, October 11, 2015

I stand before you now, incredibly afraid: Week 5 and 6

Most of the past two weeks have been dedicated to working on a second song with Jason. I have to say, seeing how much progress every classmate has made from just their previous individual songs - quite exciting.  The second song we were to bring in had to be different in style from our last song and more of a challenge. I did a bit too well fullfilling those requirements.

I decide to work on "Funny" from City of Angels because of it's far more serious tone and it was within my range. The reason it was within my range was because I had been singing it in a much lower key. After a few attempts to sustain the final few notes at the top of my range, Jason asked if I had another song. We looked through my book and found a song from Parade called "It Don't Make Sense".

Jason began to work with me on this new song. At this point, however, my voice was tired from trying to hit those high notes in "Funny" and still frustrated that I couldn't hit those notes. My frustration was clear to Jason, so working on the song devolved into a conversation on my insecurities with singing 'correctly'. While I do not at all doubt the importance of the conversation, I was still uncomfortable talking about it in front of my classmates.  I felt I shouldn't be taking up their time with musings of self-doubt that can be easily done on my own. 

Anyway, Jason had mentioned that a song sung by the character of Leo in Parade might be better suited for me. The next class I had selected yet another song: "It's Hard to Speak My Heart". I love this song to begin with, so I was pretty stoked to get to sing it. The song is still very difficult for me, and over the course of working the song, my insecurities began to creep back in. I started to back away from sustained notes-in case I sounded bad. Jason gave me permission to sound bad: "Strong and wrong". The song is definitely a work in progress, but I do feel somewhat better about it. 

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